My children do not have chores. They are expected to pick up their toys when they finish playing with them and they are good at clearing their plates from the table when we're done eating. That's about it...for now. I think a lot of the reason they aren't required to do more is because, not enjoying it myself, I don't want to take the time to re-do it after they "try". We'll get there.
Right now the kids are asking for a new puppy. I'm solely responsible for the dog we have. Partly because I'm the only one who let's her out and feeds her and partly because she won't let anyone else do these things for her. She will literally stay next to my bed until I get up to let her out and feed her. I'm 99% of the time the first one up, but on the rare occasion that I want to sleep in, the dog is right there nagging me to let her out, even though everyone else is downstairs and has already put food in her bowl. Yep. I created this monster and would NOT like to do it again with a new puppy. So....
We're practicing responsibility with plants. I love the Dollar section at Target. I bought these plants just before Valentine's Day and PP and I planted them in their cute little pots. There are two different kind of flowers and the one barely growing is supposed to be strawberries. Twice a day the kids are responsible to water them (baby steps). A week ago they looked like this...
Then I went away for 4 days and Boog was left in charge. Today they look like this...
Not too shabby, right? He did an excellent job in making sure they got watered. I think teaching responsibility with something that is fun and interesting is a good place to start. Sure. We need to teach them about all the not-so-fun things that need to be done, but why can't they get the hang of responsibility with something that will keep their interest? Then when it's time to make the bed every morning we can remind them of how well they did growing the plants and that inner pride will motivate them for the less-than-fun parts of life.
We'll replant them outside in a couple weeks when the weather is going to stay nice. Boog asked about plant vitamins to make them grow big and strong. I had flash-backs of the prenatal vitamins I took to get him to grow "big and strong". I think this lesson in responsibility was a good choice. Here's hoping we get flowers by Summer...and a puppy shortly after.
I certainly relate to the not wanting to do part. I too had tons of responsibility put on me out of necessity as a young child due to my mom working ft, and extra jobs and being in nursing school etc. To this day I hate anything domestic in terms of cleaning. Laundry, dishes, vacuuming, dusting, etc. I do enjoy a clean house and one that is nicely decorated and organized but i loathe what it takes me to get there. And I'm not a clean freak so if it's not immaculate I don't care so much.
ReplyDeleteWe have landed on some chores for the boys to help me keep my sanity and not feel like I'm getting overwhelmed with things that they are able to do themselves. In return, they get allowance they can use to save or spend however they wish. They're learning the value of money as they have to decide what is worth parting with their hard earned money for.
The types of chores include: helping unload the dishwasher a few times a week and collecting the garbage and recycling on Thursdays so that Matt can quickly grab it when he gets home from work. I also have them put their clothes in a 3 part color coded hamper system (using bags) and when they're full they take them to the laundry room. I will wash and fold the items and put them back in their bags, they take them to their rooms to hang up or put away. Their room and closet were such a disaster before but this has helped a lot. They don't just throw clothes on the floor they haven't worn any more because they know they're going to have to put them away and carry them to be rewashed, etc.
I'm not sure if I'm creating kids that are going to loathe those chores later, but I have also seen kids that never had to help around the house... and even in their teens their moms are still doing it all. My personal take on this is that I don't know that this is doing the kids any long term favors as they enter young adult hood without ever having to work for anything. Same kids go to college on their parents dime and then are freaked out when they graduate to find out the cost of things and they can't afford the cars/apartments/etc. that they have grown accustomed to. Their jobs don't provide the lifestyle they expect or want. Etc.
It's an interesting job we mom's have to find balance in letting kids be kids and also preparing them for adulthood and the world of responsibility. I'm not sure if the answer is right for everyone, but personally I'm thankful for the hard work ethic I developed as a kid. It's still with me today and has helped me through difficult financial times.
All this to say I still hate cleaning, grocery shopping, cooking, laundry etc.
Thanks for letting me share.
I got those plants for my toddler and I to do this year, too. Our ornamental pepper seeds didn't sprout, but everything else did.
ReplyDeleteI got those plants for my toddler and I to do this year, too. Our ornamental pepper seeds didn't sprout, but everything else did.
ReplyDeleteI certainly relate to the not wanting to do part. I too had tons of responsibility put on me out of necessity as a young child due to my mom working ft, and extra jobs and being in nursing school etc. To this day I hate anything domestic in terms of cleaning. Laundry, dishes, vacuuming, dusting, etc. I do enjoy a clean house and one that is nicely decorated and organized but i loathe what it takes me to get there. And I'm not a clean freak so if it's not immaculate I don't care so much.
ReplyDeleteWe have landed on some chores for the boys to help me keep my sanity and not feel like I'm getting overwhelmed with things that they are able to do themselves. In return, they get allowance they can use to save or spend however they wish. They're learning the value of money as they have to decide what is worth parting with their hard earned money for.
The types of chores include: helping unload the dishwasher a few times a week and collecting the garbage and recycling on Thursdays so that Matt can quickly grab it when he gets home from work. I also have them put their clothes in a 3 part color coded hamper system (using bags) and when they're full they take them to the laundry room. I will wash and fold the items and put them back in their bags, they take them to their rooms to hang up or put away. Their room and closet were such a disaster before but this has helped a lot. They don't just throw clothes on the floor they haven't worn any more because they know they're going to have to put them away and carry them to be rewashed, etc.
I'm not sure if I'm creating kids that are going to loathe those chores later, but I have also seen kids that never had to help around the house... and even in their teens their moms are still doing it all. My personal take on this is that I don't know that this is doing the kids any long term favors as they enter young adult hood without ever having to work for anything. Same kids go to college on their parents dime and then are freaked out when they graduate to find out the cost of things and they can't afford the cars/apartments/etc. that they have grown accustomed to. Their jobs don't provide the lifestyle they expect or want. Etc.
It's an interesting job we mom's have to find balance in letting kids be kids and also preparing them for adulthood and the world of responsibility. I'm not sure if the answer is right for everyone, but personally I'm thankful for the hard work ethic I developed as a kid. It's still with me today and has helped me through difficult financial times.
All this to say I still hate cleaning, grocery shopping, cooking, laundry etc.
Thanks for letting me share.